Did you know that when you go through a breakup you experience acute emotional stress that can cause the left ventricle of the heart to be paralyzed?  

Stunned. 

Broken!

Breakups challenge us on many levels: mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and maybe even financially.

Relationships at their core are about safety, security, love, and acceptance – and so when that core is broken… It brings up a lot of our stuff.

Likely stuff that has been lurking, waiting to be processed, but you were too busy managing the relationships to manage your own processing. 

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Are you going through something hard? I wanted to let you know that you’re not alone. And you can use your pain as a platform to spring into aligned action. If you wanna make your life and relationships easier more meaningful and likely a little more juicy the number one way to do that is to hire me. My DMs are ipen if youre ready to call in a better version of you in 2023. #traumainformedcoach#EmotionalFitness#MentalMastery#joywithjan #RelationshipCoach#LosAngeles

♬ Renaissance (Main Title Theme) [from “The White Lotus: Season 2”] – Cristobal Tapia De Veer

Breakups are a breeding ground for transformation, if you allow it.

Jacquelne Stevens

I believe breakups are key moments in our lives that give us the opportunity to deeply reflect on ourselves, our emotions, our actions, and gain clarity about what we truly want in our relationships. 

What if you looked at your relationships as a sacred spiritual practice? 

A spiritual practice is simply a process that promotes the experience of having an open heart. 

Your breakup? It’s here to teach you something. As long as you keep your heart open to learning.

It doesn’t matter if the break up was sudden, whether is had been carefully crafted over a long period of time, whether you received the news or whether you delivered it – you are going to go through a wide range of emotions. 

Shock, denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance, and hope.

What else is in that emotional cocktail? Regret. 

Here’s what you can do if you are regretting breaking up with someone:

1. Accept that it’s part of the process. 

• When you’re in a relationship a magical third thing is created and that’s the relationship between you and the other person. So when you go through a breakup that magical thing is no longer a thing. 

2. Get clear on why you made the decision.
   • Journal it out. Write down what brought you here. Reflect on that list. Yes, the relationship was magical at one point in time and there was also likely a level of misalignment, which is why you left. You need to sift through all of the data. The good, the bad, and the ugly so that you can get clear on how YOU can change moving forward. 
3. Get clear on why you’re currently regretting the decision.
   • What’s your desire? What do you wish you had right now that you don’t? The security blanket of a relationship? The physical touch? The drama? Get clear on exactly what energy you want access to right now. (Hint: you can find that energy somewhere else)
4. Move the energy
   • Practice non attachment and if you’re stuck in sadness, get out of the house! Go on a walk, go on a run, go to yoga, go dancing! Sadness, judgment, and blame are all sticky emotions that exhaust our heads and then our bodies. You need to manually override your emotions and get out of your head and into your body. When you do, you access joy that you won’t regret it! 
5. Set your breakup intention
   • What do you want to learn throughout this breakout? I invite you to the intention of Growth. What if you could be present, be aware, and learn throughout this cycle? What if you didn’t rush it? What if you allowed yourself the time and space to feel your feelings while also moving your life, energy, and relationships forward? Do that!

You’ll make it through this breakup, I swear. 

Keep your boundaries strong and your heart soft.

And reach out if for more direct support.

I’ve got you.

This guided tool will support you in understanding the 5 most common dating & relationship hangups, the solutions, and actions you can take to bridge the gap to save time, amplify joy & most importantly stay true to yourself.